What To Do With Your Old Panties

In this economic climate, nothing is more important than recycling. Waste not, want not as they say. But what does one do with old panties? Once the elastic starts fraying, the fabric starts to become threadbare and changes color from plentiful washing, panties no longer have the same apparel appeal as they once did. 

So what does one do with old panties? The options are endless. Literally infinite. Like stars in the sky or some such other multitudinous phenomenon. Stick around and explore them with me and feel free to add your own uses in the comments section. You guys are so smart.

Masks

Panty masks are super awesome for several reasons. For one, they are distracting. A distracting disguise is the best kind as it draws attention away from the rest of one's appearance. If one does not want to be recognized after the fact being 'the guy with the pink ruffled panties' on his head is more advantageous than the '6'2  caucasian male of average build wearing jeans and a red sweatshirt'. It's not often I give out crime tips in these hubs, but they say crime will be on the rise as the recession takes hold and by jove if you're going to do it, make sure you do it right.

Rags

Panties may or may not be useful as rags. If they were hideous cotton panties, they'l probably work, if they were nice panties, they will probably not be suitable for absorbing household spills and stains.

Patches

Quilting is on a come back, and panty fabric can make for some very pretty patches. Just cut out the back and the front, pin them around a paper square and git quiltin'

Joke Material

If the panties are cute little panties, how about leaving them in amusing locations, like in your CEO's desk drawer, or in the copy machine. Panties are a key ingredient in many light hearted office pranks that will take everyone's mind off the downsizing monster stalking the halls.

Fishing Net

If they're mesh panties, the potential exists for using them to go fishing, perhaps whitebaiting. Just sew the legs shut et voila, a little net!

Extra Income

If you're a lady, you'll find that there is quite the black market trade in used panties. Be aware you may be expected to have worn them for several days straight in order for them to have become, er, suitably scented. It might seem demeaning to do this sort of thing, but remember any commodity is a good commodity in a recession.

And on that note, I think we will conclude this particular article.